This morning I walked to the end of our road in my slippers with a mug of hot coffee. The boys are old enough for me to slip out for an “end of the road” walk now. This was my first one and it felt like Life’s birthday present to me. It is a cloudless, all blue sky today. I shouted to our neighbor who was pruning her flowers how beautiful and cottage like her flower gardens are shaping up to be. She shouted back that this was just the look she was going for. I love it when conversations work out like that. I came home and danced in the kitchen while making breakfast smoothies.
While dancing in my kitchen, profound thoughts started flowing and for a moment I could see that reality really is as soft, loving, and safe as I hope it to be. I could see that we really all are ok: me, ben, our kids, our extended family, our friends, our community…the whole world.
While dancing in my kitchen, I also experienced profound gratitude for getting older. My twenties and early thirties were so very painful and I am glad to be shedding the wrinkle free skin of youth for the spotted, cracked skin of wisdom.
While dancing in my kitchen, this is the wisdom I knew in my heart of hearts:
*Love multiplies rather diminishes when it is spent. Unlike money, time, people, and oil that eventually run out, Love expands with use. It is the most renewable resource we have. Not only does Love not diminish like the other things we “use” to refill ourselves, it doesn’t have the nasty side effects of misused drugs, alcohol, sex, power, control, relationship and on and on. No hangovers with Love. only more Love.
*Love is most transforming in places and people that lack it. I think of the Scripture that says that even pagans love their friends. that is easy. but real love is how we respond to people who hurt us and to situations and systems that are run by ego fueled power and self protection. This is where the absolute power of Love shines like the triumphant light in the darkness. It worked on me!
*God is Love. He really is. His spirit is all around us, filling the cracks and crevices of our home, our atmosphere, even our very bodies. He is in our cells, merging with us in the most microscopic way. He engrains with us so that there is no distinction where He ends and we begin. He really is that close.
*In this God Love, everything is connected. Separation and scarcity are a figment of our scared imaginations. I, whose drug of choice is connection, do not have to “go and get it”, as if I am not part of a great cosmic interwovenness already. This is why I embrace getting older. Every day is closer to true seeing, where my own triggered brain no longer dictates my view of reality. Death is freedom from the prison of our own scared, self preserving perceptions. Yet even still, my mind is seeing more and more what is actually true on this earth right now: “How wide, how long, how high, how deep is the love of Christ”.
How happy this all makes me to be alive. I am filled with joy at the year ahead, whatever it brings. I trust that the great flow of God Love in me, through me, as me (thank you for that imagery Ruth Reamer) will carry me into a wider, longer, higher, deeper experience of this life in God.